Author Archives: Sharad

Three men who were l ….

Three men who were lost in the jungle were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial.

The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.

The first one came back and said to the king, “I brought ten apples.”

The king then explained the trial to him, “You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you`ll be eaten.”

The first apple went in… but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed. The second one arrived and showed the king ten b

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Dating Ads for Senio ….

Dating Ads for Seniors found in a Florida Newspaper. You can say what you want about Florida, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in “The Villages”, a Florida newspaper.


FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty. 80’s, slim, 5’4′ (used to be 5’6′), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.


LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.


SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the oce

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There are two statue ….

There are two statues in a park; One of a nude man and one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single gesture, brings the two to life!!!!!!!!


The angel tells them, “As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you’ve wished to do the most.”


He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running behind the shrubbery.


The angel waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues. After fifteen minutes, the two return, out of br

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One day, a painter f ….

One day, a painter found himself short of help and went to the unemployment office to hire someone for the day.

When he arrived, they didn’t have any painters available, but they did have a gynecologist there. He reluctantly took him along to help.

A couple of weeks later, the painter returned to the unemployment office needing temporary help again. This time there were two painters, but instead he asked for the gynecologist again.

The clerk asked, “Why do you want a gynecologist when we have two professional painters you can take right now?”

He said, “Two weeks ago when I hired the gynecologist, we arrived at the house and it was locked wi

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